"So you are saying" we must be tolerant with people trying to gaslight us?... Because the minute I smell a little hint of gas I'm done, I turn around and the conversation is over before the lighting part begins.

lol ! Why not start with changing your own narrative that you are not going to argue in the first place. Determine that respect is a great strategy. If the person won't listen then show them by example what it means to truly listen. Be respectfully attentive to anyone who opposes your viewpoint. People will follow your example once you've triggered their subconscious nature to be morally equal. The key is legitimizing that they are entitled to their viewpoint whether you agree with it or not. In time we all usually come around to seeing the other truths that lay hidden in the opposite side of an issue.

Complete waste of time!

Humans are not rational thinkers. Our mind fools us and make us believe we would make decisions based on facts and reasoning.

Ah...Jon Stewart, even we republicans miss you, clearly a democrat but listen and had a brain (lost in 2020)...but how the HELL did that terrible " comedian " get your old show?

Satanism is the real virus

Re-Frame & dig into the other persons Methods of arriving at wrong conclusions... (The other person talks down to you - Suggest more prune juice in their diet to dislodge brain farts)...

Cognitive dissonance lesson 1. Eating animals makes you an animal abuser.

No reference to Dunning-Kruger effect? Logic cannot work without accurate truths based on knowledge. Some people are simply less knowledgeable. Education from alternate sources works best.

Clear as mud.

The worst kinds of people in this regard are those who aren't interested in learning what you have to say but only want to broadcast their own story. That's most politicians.

Women don't use logic, they use emotions

Once a person raises their voice they lost the argument

Great videos but I have to say that you need to slow down. Just a little bit. Thanks.

Pretty good explanation. I'd say that some of the signs are combinable, like seeing nefarious motive / _ad hominem_ and yelling. Also, "shifting the goalposts," which seems to me the most salient of the signs, is similar to _tu quoque_ or "whataboutism," of which we've heard so much of late. I think the chief dynamic that gives us the disreputable meaning of "argument" is something encapsulated in a phrase borrowed from radio operators: "push to talk." Some of us are such champions of a particular point of view that we can't receive any information about it until we've transmitted everything we know. I don't mean JUST that we keep talking, though that's a common feature, I mean that all contrary opinions are suspect until their speakers have accepted the virtue of ours.

I'd like to know how to do some of the tips for those with ADHD.

Also, you should take a look at FriendlyJordies. The guy is getting attacked by news media in Australia all the time and he just spikes the ball back with tremendous effect, hilarity, and research.

I almost forgot O'reilly existed. He and John Stewart were such a great broken home to watch.

Rule #1: Don't argue with people who have a Greek chorus on their side. Otherwise known as the 'Bill Maher Rule'.

So, while I did appreciate the video, the message and all the excellent points made within it; The use of the term, or phrase, "cognitive dissonance" felt a bit weird to me as it has a somewhat other meaning ingrained in my mind. I had to argue with myself as to whether or not this was a worthy investment of my time to reply and try to clarify, and I think one of the reasons that I took the decision to do so, is that I want to clear up - my own - confusion on the meaning of the words, if that is the case, or help others understand the term as I have understood it, if that should prove to be the case. I.e. "please correct me if I am wrong". I do not get the sense that people, that have locked into a mindset or an opinion, suffer from cognitive dissonance, per se. Rather I would explain it simply with the argument that they are so mentally locked into a mindset that they do not listen. Determined to make a point. Not any disharmony of their experiences to their expectations, which is what cognitive dissonance entails, for me. At least not yet. These people might use logical fallacies to argue their position, even though they might be proven wrong and/or be otherwise stubborn about it, but I would say that any cognitive dissonance, will not set in - until - they are hit by the fact that their opinion on the matter is in disharmony with the true state of affairs. The facts of the matter do not "line up" with what they have told themselves and hence, they will feel disconnected, in disharmony, or dissonance with what they "now see". The cognitive dissonance would hence be them feeling "out of touch", since their opinion, their stance on a matter, was invalidated. I.e, a later effect of this arguing, if they could be made to listen to logic at all. I think that Cathy Newman felt cognitive dissonance - when - she got stumped by Jordan Peterson, since her opinion, which she tried to push, was so effectively invalidated by Jordan. Her outlook before that though, was not due to "congitive dissonance". It is like using the word for an effect of something to describe the cause of it. It feels weird to me. So what should we then call the kind of mental blockage presented in this video? Stubbornness? Belligerence? I'dnno... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Kinda difficult to explain but I hope I made my point clear and if anyone else don't agree with me, please, tell me what you feel I have misunderstood. Thank you kindly for reading.

Lol is that Kylo ren

Rubber Sheet.

Oof... So um... *I get frustrated when people I’m discussing with end up in cognitive dissonance...* I often end up with people targeting my character rather than my arguments and other things like when their arguments have inconsistencies - I find it confusing how people stop making sense, or misinterpret my intentions/ statements ect So I end up raising my voice and trying to re-explain my point in being confused how people don’t understand what I’m saying *I don’t think I find myself often trying to win an argument?* but I do know that I struggle in wanting people to understand me/ my points - maybe it’s more like I feel like I have to try and defend myself with my arguments when they attack my character, and so maybe I too end up in some form of dissonance, in trying to use my arguments to defend?🤔 (Not that I want to change people’s perspective or opinion, but I like to feel like I can be understood ect, because I like to try understand people’s sides too- even while I might not support it) it’s just draining when they start attacking me- when they haven’t even taken the time to get to know me 🥴😅

I have talked to many of these people over the last few years (including now, my wife) and don't get how previously seemingly intelligent people can now dump common sense and logic and adamantly argue a point you both know is wrong but with a half smirk on they're face. How can they disregard and accept knowing that we know they are full of BS.

Your first example show's your cognitive dissonance and your lack of any logical truth first you define cognitive dissonance inaccurately.. although Beliefs and actions can be a form of cognitive Dissonance it's not exclusive. Belief system's that are IN conflict with other beliefs systems .. like Christian Scientists.. no action required second your example is totally incorrect of a smoker wanting to live a long life .. just because some one want's to live along life and understands smoking most likely will make such desires unlikely doesn't mean they don't exactly understand that they should quite need to quite but still don't .. this is a cognitive bias your showing towards smokers .. must i go show you examples of 101 year old smokers .. or George Burns .. your logic is very faulty here .. this is were pressure to produce quantity of video Dilute the quality of those video's .. your about 50 50 on video that are worth watching .. The psychological tension that occurs when one holds mutually exclusive beliefs or attitudes and that often motivates people to modify their thoughts or behaviors in order to reduce the tension.. Basicly they begin lying to them selves.  so they don't have to change thier behavior .

Ben Frisbee hat won't ever use logic

Say to them ok. Your the boss as you no better. Watch them crash. But be there to help them stand afterwards. They should be grateful. Lol

O'Reilly owned Stewart in this exchange.

*laughs in sexual assault allegations*

I used to watch a good number of your videos, back when the content seemed to be more geared towards picking up women. I walked away for a while and checked this video on a whim. And I really like it! its about how to become a better person by using these techniques to hold the mirror up to life. It seems like this channel has undergone an evolution and I really like what I'm seeing now! Congratulations to you and I appreciate the good work!

Wow! It's amazing how complete this was! Thank you!

To quote a great philosopher the only thing i know is that i know nothing

Golden advice in today's day

I just wanted to pop in to remind you that Ben Affleck never had any reason to be at that discussion. He’s not nearly smart or honest enough. I liked Affleck generally as an actor before seeing the segment. I won’t even watch two of my favorite movies, Pearl Harbor & Good Will Hunting after having witnessed what an absolute dishonest blockhead he is.

Cathy Newman's hot.

Ben Affleck was just virtue signaling with Sam Harris.

Often B.S. is simply B.S. no matter how polite and emotionally valid someone's fragile ego demands. The Truth hurts. Get over it. My rule: be more interested in their Questions than their Answers.

Labels, labels, labels.. we are here to grow, learn, and become more . Perhaps one day we will all get there..or not.

But Bill oReil WAS right in that example. And not being inconsistent and not suffering from cognitive dissonance. His outage was the president of the USA supporting that artist. The president didn't invite those other artists into the white house and stoke the near dead embers of racism.

Saul alinskytactics

Conversations should always be to understand, not to respond. We have two ears and one mouth for a reason.

I'm glad Stewart is off TV.

Reason doesn’t work well against emotional arguments. An emotional and irrational argument can force you into a corner, where you cannot escape. One thing a person can do is take your very words, turn them so they have none of their original meaning, and feed them back as weapons against you.

i was just about to rush and tell my husband what is his problem, but never mind : )

Can we talk about the total lack of charisma that Shapiro dude has? Why the hell does he keep getting calls to appear on TV? He looks and sounds like he's just... angry and in a mood to fight anyone at any time.

This assumes you've decided you need to argue and/or converse with others to learn. Personally, I'd rather read a book to educate myself and/or reassess my position on an issue or subject.

I agree with everything as principle, but I think the “attacking the character part” is necessary sometimes.. e.g: Sam Harris, Hirsi Lawrence K. New age atheists and others albeit brilliant in their respective fields and orators do not comprehend what Islam is. I.e they ain’t know jack about Islam. Lol, I think calling out when someone doesn’t know something correctly while railing against it which such volatility in rhetoric and arrogance is absolutely fine..

I've just gone to agreeing with them. I say "Yes, we stole the election, we OWNED you, and you can sit in the corner and eat your poop sandwich. I am now YOUR MASTER.

Someone refuses to debate or monologues, make your statement and walk away.

Oh! Oh! I know this one! You have to argue with your fists. Eventually they will agree with your point(s).

Ben , you don't argue with unprincipled Democrats ... Just like you don't try to reason with the devil !

Cant we just call cog diss delusion?

Ben Affleck: " Im and intellectual, Anyone : " no your not " ...... BA : " Good Will Hunting "

I've naturally been doing this all my life. Thanks for letting me know what it's called.

hmm.. by the time you get up to arguing, its too late anyway.

I have an older sister who has been pro left (mainly because she hated the "orange" man). She often brings up a political opinion from MSM, then shuts down any questions I have with the misinformation. Such as: how can you be a Christan and be pro-abortion? Or, Pres Trump's tongue in cheek remark about bleach to treat covie? (I knew he was not serious, but she felt he was?) Charlottesville, there were evil people on both sides... Not simply a woman of color being attacked. I just asked her to watch the FULL video, not the edited one shown on MSM.

And just lying! When they start lying, it’s time to let it go.

I guess that's why my sister screamed in my face and left in a flustered manner.

Fantastically well balanced, don't know if I've ever watched anything so transcendently apolitical for a while, kudos 🌟🌟🌟

You mean , narcissism....

Yo was that z nation?

Facts and statistics don’t matter when debating liberals and leftists. They will also discount the statistics and the facts and talk about feelings.

Almost 100% of the time. But as was explained, all people have a rebellion against what makes the uncomfortable but throughout my engineering experience conservatives are more accepting of being shown they're wrong on something. Important to present correct info tactfully though. The best way is to lead them to discovering it themselves if possible. Emotion wins over rationality in humans.

conversation in a game chat be like me: asks a guy something guy: what me: look up (he knew i meant chat) him: i OnLy sEe sKy

This is beautiful, and I will begin looking at these things Today! My communication degree is very disappointed with me.

Rational discussion with the left is mute, as they are irrational people.

Emotion triumphs over rationality. Except in Vulcans.

This is why Baruch Spinoza is an underrated philosopher. He was crazy smart. Highly critical of religion back in the late medieval/early renaissance but he understood that people arent essentially rational but emotional creatures. You shouldn't assume that people will do the right thing based on facts. The only thing that works is by countering emotions with other emotions. And Its supported by recent studies. Think about it. Our emotions are shared with animals. Its evolutionarily ancient. Its by far the dominant part of our psyche. And according to recent studies by Antonio Damasio on people with damaged ventromedial cortices which in effect makes them unable to feel emotions. Without it they become unable to make decisions at all.

T his video is ... *Instructions from a Narcissist* on *How to be the best Narcissist*

Your video is flawed because the left doesn't argue facts, only fiction!

I’ve learned that it’s all about relationships. If you are talking to a stranger it’ll be harder to convince them that they are wrong (or persuade them to your argument). It’s not impossible just harder as opposed to actually establishing a relationship with that person (a healthy one). The closer you are to that person, the more likely they will be to accept what you have to say. If they see that you have their best interest in mind, they will at least seriously consider your viewpoint.

The biggest problem is that people don't seem to understand the concept of debate anymore. Instead of putting forward their best, well thought out points/views in a coherent manner then listening and understanding the opposite sides then you're just arguing your own pre conceived views to win try and win an argument. You should always want to be wrong about something or learn something you didn't know as it will only better your perspective

The defiant carriage naturally destroy because stem observationally man outside a loving seeder. cruel, tricky flesh

This advice isn't relevant for news reporting because they're not trying to convince the other person, they're speaking to the audience, the viewer who already believes and needs a good point, or the viewer on the fence who is open to the logic. I saw the Ben Shapiro interview, and clearly, Ben was being hashed out for criticism.

*_The first thing a man will do for his ideals is lie._* ~ Joseph A. Schumpeter *_Idealism is the noble toga that political gentlemen drape over their will to power._* ~ Aldous Huxley *_it is difficult to get a man to understand something when his income depends on his not understanding it._* ~ Henry Louis Mencken *_The men the American people admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars; the men they detest most violently are those who try to tell them the truth._* ~ Henry Louis Mencken *_The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule._* ~ Henry Louis Mencken *_People who refuse to accept unpleasant truths have no right to complain about politicians who lie to them. What other kind of candidates would such people elect?_* ~ Thomas Sowell *_The masses have never thirsted after truth. Whoever can supply them with illusions is easily their master; whoever attempts to destroy their illusions is always their victim._* ~ Gustave Le Bon (1841-1931) *_The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function._* ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald *_Any virtue carried to extremes becomes a vice._* ~ Aristotle *_Neurosis is always a substitute for legitimate suffering._* ~ Carl Jung, 1938 _Psychology and Religion_ *_The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely._* ~ Carl Jung

George Dubayah says : Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice uh uh uh uh..... A fool cant be fooled again.

Telling "the truth" will meet emotional reaction if the other has not processed it, or is not willing to face it. But we continue to bludgeon them and create damage.

Jesse lee peterson is SUPER good at the 1rst mindset :D

It's not about cognitive dissonance it's about power/control. When someone doesnt hear you when you are making good sense, it is because they don't want to hear you and they dont respect your ideas. Controlling, abusive people purposely don't understand what is being said to them because they dont want to understand what you are saying to them. If they did, they would lose their sense of power which is all they have to feel good about themselves. This "you dont make sense" when you do is one of the last steps in the destruction of a society. A complete social collapse is at hand.

How to never fall into it: 1) Bury your pride. 2) Value truth above all things.

The Earth is FLAT!

Just shoot them

SO YOURE SAYING YOU HATE ME?

The entirety of human history is a giant run on sentence in cognitive dissonance that starts with "war, conquest, domination, slavery, greed, repression, corruption, lies, death" and ends with "that was fun let's do it all over again.

Ben Affleck knows nothing about muslims

We can all be faced with a response or an idea that is surprising (perhaps culturally or socially inappropriate or unusual) or makes us question the information or beliefs we have, without the new information being more correct. Not every "new idea" a person comes across is necessarily better or more true than old information and beliefs. The full "truth" evades all arguments. There is your perspective and my perspective, and then there is the actual truth, which neither of us is wholly privy to. Perhaps one of us is closer, but who really knows for certain? What makes someone believe themselves as logical and that others' opinions are not logical or even inferior?

Lol

I love debating, but I've learned only to debate a position that I have such strong conviction for that I can feel it in bones that I'm right. After that, I'll only choose to debate the subject if it has a potentially lasting benefit to at least one person present. It most likely won't be the one I'm debating; their mind most likely won't be malleable enough.

This shows that facts truly do not matter. What matters is who has the stronger manipulative skills.

@R E sad to say our court system as well there's innocent people in prison and guilty people walking free because of the skill level of arbitration in the court room between prosecutors and public defenders

@R E It always has been.

*persuasion skills for me. I feel like manipulation should be used for when you wanna abuse someone versus persuasion where you could either want them to simply see and understand your side or fully support it (or at least respect it).

@Nunchuck Daddy Well no. Entire movements have usurped cultures and nations based on manipulative tactics with intermittent superficial facts. Narrative and propaganda matter more than anything.

Cause of many divorces.

now all of this only touches on the subject that doesnt get enough description: if we become logical beings in our entirety, we lose our humanity. Communism was incredibly logical. so much so that it could justify killing millions of its own citizens because....logically it made sense.

Don't forget the need for ethics. That'll rule out communism.

if you come across as trying to "win" the argument then it is highly likely you will not convince them.

Logic over Feelings any day lol

Thanks man for the insight. Intrigued I am

Some people lack the ability to think rationally. You will never win that argument. Others purposely disagree to push a narrative for political gain. You will never win that argument. Unless the person values truth and has ethics, the theory is moot. The fact this presenter ignores these two concepts, seems to demonstrate his own cognitive dissonance.

My friend believes in the flying horse for his religion but wouldn't believe in my fairies at the bottom of my garden, that's when you have to say okay................................. and walk off... he has won but so have i...

First

As a smoker I disagree because this hurts my feelings!

It is what it is, an addiction. 🙂

👍👍👍

Sam Harris is right, as he usually is. Ben Affleck is just pretty. And he is so *into political correctness.*

Omg I really love this video. I'm going to share it with others I know. Thanks.

The problem is this lethal way of communicating is celebrated and endorsed in American culture.

Although I agree with Sam Harris in this instance, conflate does not mean what he thinks it does: con·flate /kənˈflāt/ Learn to pronounce verb past tense: *conflated* ; past participle: *conflated* combine (two or more texts, ideas, etc.) into one. "the urban crisis conflates a number of different economic and social issues."

Help! This world is matching my predefined expectations. Well, maybe not going the way I thought it would but I do want the world saved from something stating with 'V'. People need to be thinking about contents of "V's, and consider the consequences of what will happen to them after readily accepting 'V's. Maybe I will have to just stand back and let it happen!??